


A Week and a Day (of Love for You)

by high_functioning_sociopath



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Hanukkah, Jewish Peter Parker, M/M, Menorah, Moving In Together, they have a LOT of sex but no actual smut, wannabe sugar daddy wade wilson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:07:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28093641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/high_functioning_sociopath/pseuds/high_functioning_sociopath
Summary: It’s inevitable that things will break every time one moves house. How can Peter replace something that was worth infinitely more in sentimental value? If he can’t, Wade certainly can.+“This is the best!!! I’m gonna find us the bestest apartment your cute little butt’s ever seen!!! It’ll have an extra bedroom so we can have sex in a different bed whenever we want!!! And a huge shower so we can have sex in the shower whenever we want!!! And an island in the kitchen so we can—”“Have sex on the kitchen island whenever we want, I got it,” Peter finishes with a fond eye roll.
Wade lifts his head and shrugs. “I was gonna say so we can have lots of room for brunch. But, hey, I love where your head’s at!!!”+Spideypool Bromantic Bingo:Menorah
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Comments: 13
Kudos: 82
Collections: Isn't it Bromantic- Holiday Bingo 2020





	A Week and a Day (of Love for You)

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much to [muntin](https://www.archiveofourown.org/users/CuteAsAMuntin/pseuds/CuteAsAMuntin) for beta'ing!!! you're the best bb!! <3 (and also for the 'wannabe sugar daddy wade' tag because i love it hahaha)
> 
> and thanks to WaterMe for getting the menorah fill in first and fueling my need to finish this one and represent my people 😂
> 
> (also, title is from the parody song [A Week and a Day](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5YNNkR1hJI&ab_channel=TheLateLateShowwithJamesCorden), which i highly recommend checking out!)

“Move in with me,” Peter says one night, plastered along his boyfriend under the sheets, sticky with drying sweat.

Wade’s hands still where they’re stroking and tapping along Peter’s skin as he waxes poetic about…something. Probably his ass — Peter hadn’t been listening. His brain’s been going a mile a minute since he came down from his second orgasm of the night (because if there’s only one thing that didn’t surprise him when he finally got together with The One and Only Deadpool, it’s that the man is a _master_ of dick), reminding him how deeply content he’s been with Wade Wilson in his life like this. How nothing’s ever been so right and so easy in Peter’s life. Telling him he needs to do everything to keep this.

To move forward with it.

After nearly a minute, Peter starts to fidget, nerves creeping up in the sudden, rare silence. He pulls away just enough to be able to look up at Wade, and his breath catches at the look of wonder on his face.

Sometimes, Peter wonders how he looks through Wade’s eyes. He thinks it must be lovely.

Peter’s lips form a soft smile at the thought, and it seems to break Wade out of his surprise. He lets out a very high-pitched squeal and flips them over with his arms around Peter’s hips and his face buried in his stomach. Peter laughs as his nerves disappear with Wade’s visible excitement.

“Oh em gee, baby boy!!!” Wade squeals, rubbing his nose back and forth against Peter’s belly, making Peter laugh and slap at him.

“Stooooop, that tickles!”

“This is the best!!! I’m gonna find us the bestest apartment your cute little butt’s ever seen!!! It’ll have an extra bedroom so we can have sex in a different bed whenever we want!!! And a huge shower so we can have sex in the shower whenever we want!!! And an island in the kitchen so we can—”

“Have sex on the kitchen island whenever we want, I got it,” Peter finishes with a fond eye roll.

Wade lifts his head and shrugs. “I was gonna say so we can have lots of room for brunch. But, hey, I love where your head’s at!!!” With a grin, he crawls up Peter’s body to flop down full-body on top of him, ignoring Peter’s soft _oomph_ , and nuzzling into his neck. “I’m gonna make sure you live in the lap of luxury like you’ve never dreamed, Petey pie.”

Peter smiles, small and soft, and places a kiss on the scarred skin of Wade’s head. “As long as you’re living it with me.”

* * *

They christen the new apartment on the floor of their bedroom, and the spare bedroom, and the shower, and the kitchen island. Wade loudly thanks the superpower-giving gods after the fifth round of orgasms before passing out on a pile of moving boxes.

* * *

“Wade?” Peter calls out between frustrated mutters as he sifts through their mass of unpacked boxes. “Have you seen my ‘miscellaneous’ box?”

There’s a series of _crash, boom, bang, “OW!”_ from the other side of the apartment before Wade pops his masked head into the living room area. “Oooooooohhh, you tryna get down an’ dirty with ol’ Wilson, baby boy?” Wade purrs. “The box is in the room, we used it last night! And the night before that. And the night before that. And the night before that. I think we passed out watching Jeopardy the night before that. But then again the night before that—”

“No, that’s literally labeled the toy box,” Peter interrupts with a snort. “The miscellaneous box. Labeled miscellaneous. Or, MISC, I guess. Have you seen it? I’m pretty sure I put my menorah in it.”

Wade hums in thought, moving into the room and kicking a few of the boxes aside to look at their labels. “Sorry, boo bear. Got no idea.”

Peter falls back onto his heels with a heavy sigh, bringing a hand down his face as he mutters, “God damn it.”

WIth a frown (Peter will never get over how expressive his mask is), Wade crouches next to him. “Aww, don’t pout, shnookums. We can get you another one, right? We’ve still got two months!”

“Four days.”

“We’ve still got four days!”

Peter sighs again. “I know. It’s just… I don’t know. It was the one I lit with Ben, you know? It was our thing. Just us, and May, and about ten million other Jews.”

The joke feels flat, but Wade throws his head back and laughs like it’s the funniest thing he’s heard all year. It makes Peter feel better, and he smiles and places a kiss at the lips of the red mask.

“Wanna go to Target and get a new one?” Wade offers after a few moments. “Ooh, we can also stock up on chocolate! That’s a Hanukkah thing, right?”

“Chocolate coins, yeah,” Peter affirms with a soft laugh. “Nah, it’s okay. It’s not like ours was anything special. I think Ben got it at Walmart for like ten bucks.” He leans his head onto Wade’s shoulder with a hum. “It’s the sentimental bit that mattered. I’ll just grab one of those crappy two-dollar tin ones for now. Maybe I’ll order a really pretty one by next year.”

“Okie dokie!” Wade agrees, high-pitched and chipper. “In the meantime…” He wraps his hands around Peter’s waist and flings him over onto his shoulder in a fireman’s carry, patting Peter’s butt in ‘comfort’ when he squeals. “We’ve got a box of miscellaneous to get through! To the bedroom!”

“You’re insatiable,” Peter grumbles, hiding his grin in Wade’s back. Still, he takes the opportunity to reach down and squeeze Wade’s ass — he may have superpowers, but he’s still _human_.

* * *

Peter sets up a small folding table by the window, setting a bit of aluminum foil on it so he doesn’t have to worry about the wax drippings. He bites at his thumbnail as he double-checks that the window shade is high enough that it won’t risk catching the flame. He’s pretty sure it is, but his last apartment he had to put his menorah on the kitchen table because he didn’t have any windows he could safely keep it by, so he’s a little nervous.

He puts the cheap menorah-tin-thing on the table and is about to put the candles in when Wade walks out of the bedroom with a sing-songy, “Ohhhhhh, Peeeeeeteeeeeeyyyyyy~!”

“Yeah, babe?” Peter asks distractedly, checking over the shades again, thumbnail worried between his teeth.

A tingle runs through Peter’s body right before Wade slips behind him and pokes at his sides. He jumps in surprise, despite being Spidey-warned, before turning around and smacking his hand against Wade’s chest. “Don’t do that!” he hisses.

“Sorry, pookie pie,” Wade apologizes, sounding completely insincere. “But I got you something!!”

The merc is practically vibrating with excitement as he holds out the rectangular present, clumsily “wrapped” with two crumpled pizza flyers.

Peter looks between Wade and the parcel with a small, wary smile before taking the gift in hand and plucking the flyers off, letting them fall carelessly to the floor.

“Oh, _Wade_ ,” Peter breathes.

It’s very clearly handmade (by Wade’s own hands, not professional ones) — a block of sanded wood, white paint smeared sloppily over it, too thick in some places and almost non-existent in others. The thick parts are uneven in a rippling, dripping pattern that makes Peter wonder if Wade just held a blow dryer to it. On one side is a drawing of the Deadpool and Spider-Man masks kissing, exaggerated lips and all, with a heart around it, and the other side is just Peter’s butt (which he knows because it’s got an arrow pointing to it with “peTey’S perfecT buTT” written right there). They’re both in crayon. There’s even a sloppy drawing of what’s probably supposed to be a penis.

On top, there’s eight hex nuts lined up in a row, with two stacked in the center, hot glue gunned on and just as sloppy as the rest of it.

It’s like a menorah that kids would make in a Hebrew school, except way more naughty. And a lot uglier.

Peter _adores_ it.

“It’s okay if you don’t like it,” Wade starts when Peter doesn’t immediately say anything else. “We can still get you a really cool one for next year! Or you can just use the one you have right now, I can just dump this one, I know it’s silly—”

Peter lets out a loud whine just to shut him up, cradling the menorah to his chest protectively. “You touch my present and I’ll web you to the ceiling, Wade Wilson. And not in the kinky way!”

Wade straightens happily and grins. “Oh, it’s always the kinky way, pumpkin!”

Peter rolls his eyes fondly before wrapping his arms around Wade’s neck to give him a kiss. “I love it so much. It’s my new favorite thing in the world. We’re gonna have kids just so I can make them use it, too.” He pauses and frowns. “Well. Maybe not, considering the drawings.”

“That’s the best part!”

Peter smiles and kisses him again. “Seriously, Wade. Thank you.”

Wade wraps his arms around Peter’s waist in a warm embrace. “Happy Hanukkah, sugar cake.”

(Half the hex nuts fall off before the week is over. Peter doesn’t even care.)

**Author's Note:**

> happy chanukah to anyone celebrating/participating!!! <3 <3 <3


End file.
